In the words of French novelist George Sand, “there is only one happiness in this life, to love and be loved.” While we’re pretty sure there are at least a few other things that bring us some happiness (a good book, a new journal, or basically anything involving chocolate), we do recognize the truth behind the sentiment—love is incredibly powerful. Love has an unmatched ability to lift us up and make us feel like life without it is a dull, grayscale version of what living really is.

Of course, we all know that the most desired things in life can be the hardest to get, and unfortunately, love is no exception. Sometimes we get lucky and certain types of love come easily (hi, mom and dad!), but other times it feels like that mid-roller-coaster-freefall, so-happy-you-might-throw-up type of love will forever be out of reach. 

The good news, though, is that there are things within our control that can help us love and be loved. Whether you’re searching for romance, looking to start a new friendship, or seeking out ways to improve your relationship with a relative, here are a few ways to start working on that crazy little thing called love:

  • Focus on the positives. It’s easy to feel jaded and scorned on the heels of a relationship that ended poorly, but the Law of Attraction says that positive or negative thoughts bring positive or negative experiences into a person's life. So, rather than focusing on what you don’t like about someone else or letting negative experiences from a previous relationship dictate your search for a new one, instead, focus on the qualities you do want and find important. Need a little help? Try meditation as a way to calm your mind, dismiss negative thoughts, and leave space for positive thinking.

  • Get right with yourself. If you’re not the person you want to be, don’t seek out a new relationship thinking that it’s going to solve all your problems. Our relationships should complement who we are, not carry the pressure of needing to fill voids. Work on getting happy with yourself, and then allow a relationship to enhance who you already are. Consider making a list of all the things you like about yourself—your talents, your favorite parts of your body, your interesting quirks that make you unique—and learn to view yourself lovingly.

  • Love others. Offering love is such an important part of receiving love, and we don’t just mean the romantic kind. Love your friends, love your family, love your pets, love your life. Open yourself up to all-encompassing love—the more you give, the more you get. But remember, your love shouldn’t be conditional on them loving you in return. We know, unrequited love can be unpleasant, but don’t let it distract you from your goal: to be an all-around more loving person. Even small acts of kindness matter—send a nice text to someone telling them what you like and admire about them. Sharing your love verbally and physically is a great way to make someone’s day!

  • Write it down and stick with it. Really think about what you want in a relationship and then document it. Create concise goals for who you want to be and what you seek in the other person, put them to paper, and then refer back to these intentions often. If needed, re-write them on a regular basis to really commit them to memory and reaffirm your objectives. And don’t be afraid to reevaluate, either. If what you want to work on in yourself or what you seek out of a relationship changes, re-write your goals and continue on. The important thing here is to know your path and to remain persistent.

      While there are plenty more ways to work toward attracting love in your life, we find these to be a few of our top focuses. Giving and receiving love is such a personal, vulnerable thing that can be difficult to achieve and uncomfortable to work toward, but in the end, the effort and perseverance opens us up to a world of happiness unlike any other. With that in mind, and your new intentions, we wish you a life filled with love!

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