As I said above, in order to have a fulfilling sex life we have to open ourselves up to talking with our partner about what we like, what feels good, what we’d like to explore. Even couples that have amazing communication skills in general can struggle with this. We just aren’t encouraged to talk about it and often we don’t want to hurt our partner’s feelings or make them think we aren’t enjoying our time with them.
What if you thought of it this way- you and your partner both want each other to experience the most pleasure possible, right? Well if that is true then letting them know what could increase your pleasure is helping that to happen. I like to have couples look at each other and make that statement- “I’m invested in you experiencing the most pleasure possible.” This way you are giving each other space to express yourselves in alignment with this intention. This is a great place to begin.